Just another box

Just another box

So many times

I have searched

And sorted

The corners of my mind

Rearranging pieces

To find a better fit

Attempting to create

A different picture

That is far

From the truth

Brightly coloured

Shards of glass

Though pretty

Still draw blood

Flaunting my mistakes

In spite of

My wearing gloves

They did not come

From a place of love

So many bad things

Have been packed away

In boxes labelled

‘Closure’, ‘What the Hell?’ or

Simply ‘Not today’

Boxes, that I hope

I will never reason to

Ever open again

 

Sharon Carter-Wray

(Friday 17thMay 2019)

Link to: Life laundry

 

 

It is a heavy thing…

It is a heavy thing…

Don’t know where to begin

But it is a heavy thing

Weighing on my mind

Words that should be said

Feel heavy

And falter on my tongue

Remaining unspoken

Upon my lips

And silent

Within my heart instead

 

It is a heavy thing I bear

The weight of others’ woes

When none of them

Ever enquire

About my own

But I am to care

Feel their weight

Feel sadness, pity

And empathise

Obviously

Appearing whole –

Complete in their eyes

 

It is a heavy thing

That I hold deep inside

There’s little appeal

When I see their

Concern for others

And the motives

That lie behind

It is a heavy thing

That they will never see

My torment

Or the tears

I dare not cry

 

It is a heavy thing

To not say

How I really feel

 

Sharon Carter-Wray

(Thurs 9thMay 2019)

Link to: Letting go…

 

 

 

I am enough

I am enough

I am enough

I do not need to be told

No man will complete me

No money will

Make me whole

 

I am enough

As I stand here

So mighty, so tall

Many have tried

To break me

Many more have failed

Thinking I need them

To blow wind in my sails

 

I am enough

I have nothing to prove

And just as equally

I have nothing to lose

 

I am enough

See that I am a Queen

For that is whom

I have become

I need no crown

No sparkly jewels

I am armoured plated

By life’s unfair rules

 

I am enough

I am strong and proud

And like a true warrior woman

I will shout this out loud

Sharon Carter-Wray

(6th January 2018)

I am enough artwork

 

Still waiting

Still waiting

I’m still waiting

For the day to come

When I will

Rise up and be free

Of all the mental chains

That still restrain me

I’m still craving

Patiently and longingly,

For that special

Kind of love

People speak of

So openly

I’m still waiting

Desperately

For that someone

Who is my soul mate

My mirror image

One who will confirm

We are meant to be

I’m still waiting

 

Sharon Carter-Wray

(Friday 26thApril 2019)

 

Go

Go

Go

Fly so high

Set yourself free

Do not be held back

By another’s mediocrity

 

Sharon Carter-Wray

(Weds 24th April 2019)

 

Damaged

Damaged

No one can see

The real damage

That has been done to me

I do not wear it

Boldly on my sleeve

I am not looking

For kindness

Or empathy

I know who I am

It’s not what I need

But just because

You can’t see my pain

Doesn’t mean

It isn’t there

 

Sharon Carter-Wray

(Weds 24thApril 2019)

Cravings

Cravings

I crave for something

So simple

Yet so hard to find

A man who wants and needs

Not just my body

But also my mind

 

Sharon Carter-Wray

(Weds 24thApril 2019)

 

 

Restless in my mind

Restless

In my mind

There are many questions

That rest uneasy

In my soul

But doubting myself

Is not one of them

I see myself

In another’s eyes

And wonder

What do they need from me?

What purpose do I serve?

Is it one

That I would be happy

To compromise?

Or make a sacrifice again?

If it means me

Being less than I am

Right now?

Sometimes

The moment has passed

Sometimes it never comes

And I feel restless

Caught somewhere

In between the lines

Of words spoken

And unsaid

Asking myself

Should I leave well alone?

Or see where it heads?

 

Sharon Carter-Wray

(Sunday 21stApril 2019)

I’ve learnt how to fly

I’ve learnt how to fly

4 years ago, I walked away

From a life that had once

Held so much hope

But was destined

Not to last

It had a life span

Of time to be served

Too long for my liking

And not what I deserved

A painful lesson

I had to learn

But it was all part

Of life’s learning curve

I took my own sweet time

To walk away

Had no idea

Of the penance

I would finally pay

Just knew

I had to be saved

Or be chased

To an early suicidal grave

But 4 years have gone

And my oh my

How I’ve moved on

The bittersweet taste

Left in my mouth

Is no longer as strong

I’ve grown new wings

I have learnt how to fly

I’ve been taught

What to take with me

What to leave behind

I now understand

That bags emblazoned

Love and Friendship

Weigh me down

They don’t help me climb

But true friendship

Like air helps me rise

I’m going places

That is for sure

But you have a choice

You can either come with me

Or stay

right

there

At the door.

 

Sharon Carter-Wray

(Weds 17thApril 2019)

Happy Anniversary to me!  4 years since moving on…. Sx ❤️

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