There have been many times

When I have felt nothing

But lost and alone

Even in times when

Many have surrounded me

I never understood the feeling

Or why I had such

Pain in my heart

But I have been lacking

Such a sense of belonging

Looking for something

That I will only find in myself

 

But now, I know

That I am truly blessed

Answers to my questions

Were always within me

Even at the moments

When I have been so weak

But a bright and beautiful

Future lay ahead of me

The horizon is looking

Hopeful and clear

The dark clouds of

Anger and regrets that

For so long have

Hung above my head

Are now nowhere to be seen

Instead, all I visualise is a

Much happier version of me

 

Sadness, had embraced me

So close and warm

Loneliness, was its company

So soft and forlorn

I made myself believe

That what I gave so willingly

Without a moments thought

Would somehow

Want to come back

But I was wrong, so very wrong

Only because I believed

That what I ‘wanted’

Was the same as my ‘need’

But now, I know that

I am truly blessed

For I want or need of nothing

That has a price

Or for anything in fact

That demands a sacrifice

 

I have no constraints

No shackles binding me

Unbeknown to my sadness

My cage was opened

And I am indeed free

With every breath, I take a step

To finding out

Who and what

I was really meant to be

My wings have healed

My resolve is strong

And my angel’s in heaven

Are there to encourage

And inspire me to carry on

For now, I know

That I am truly blessed

Because, I have my free spirit, and

My inner strength

 

Sharon Carter-Wray

(30^th December 2017)

 

 

 

 

 

Cherish the moments

That we share

Always remember that I care

I’ll soothe away your teardrops

And paint you a smile

I’ll hush your worries

With a lullaby

 

I’m going to be there

When you need to cry

I’m going to be there

When you feel you want to die

 

I’ll help you build your castle

And cry when your dreams fade

I’ll never go back

On the promise I made

I’ll heal your hurt feelings

And brush away your fears

I will always hold you dear

 

I’m going to be there

When you need to cry

I’m going to be there

When you feel you want to die

 

When you need a new dream

I’ll sail you away

When you want to find heaven

I’ll take you there

Believe in the power of my love

As I believe in you

And I’ll give you a rainbow

When you feel only blue

 

I’m going to be there

When you need to cry

I’ll always be there

When you feel you want to die

Sharon carter-Wray

(15^th October 1991)

 

 

Come to me good spirit

Break this spell

There’s no charm left

In this wishing well

I gave it no pennies

I dropped only pounds

But alas the paper

Makes no sound

 

There is a man

I have wanted so long

Will you good spirit

Tell me where I went wrong

He’ll not come back

Though I think

He holds the key

Tell me, is he the one

That can set me free?

 

I have done my wrongs

But, I am paying the price

Will this forever be the

‘Story of my life’?

 

I try so hard

But it does no good

Is he still in my grasp?

Or is he my past?

 

The dreams I had were

Short and sweet

Of how and when

My love and I did meet

 

My dreams are only questions now

Mainly filled with

Whats and whys

Because I know not

The reasons

I do nothing

But cry each time

 

Good spirit

Does he laugh at me

For being some fool

Having no sense

But giving airs as if I do?

 

Is he making it harder for me

Because of previous rejection?

I had wanted him so much then

And crave him still

But I fear his once desire

I may have killed

 

The pain I go through

For the love of one man

Is it really worth it?

I have shed my tears

And felt the usual sting

In my heart

And still I go on

 

The memory though bad

Is still too sweet to forget

Oh spirit

Help me to decide

Do I go on?

Or do I break my stride

And turn away like he?

 

We hurt each other’s pride

We did each other wrongs

But how do we forgive

When we don’t want to apologise?

 

The story still goes on

With sorrowful looks

And silent words

But a light still burns inside

Keeping those feelings alive

Sx

(1st April 1986)

My days are full

Of nothingness

My nights

Do lack sweet dreams

Sx

(7th April 1986)

I do not wish to know

What love really is

To have it defined in words

Would surely remove it true value

I’ll know what love is all about

When it comes to me

No sooner, no later

Maybe now, maybe then

Who am I to wait for it?

Or ask when?

I’ll know when my heart explodes

Sending tiny pieces glistening

From the inside to the

Outside of my soul

At the mere thought

Of being near the one I love

I’ll know when my days are filled

With a pure need to be with him

And my nights lonely dreams

If he were not there

I’ll know when my free spirit

Is no longer frightened

Of being shared

And my inner strength

Fears not being looked into

Through the windows

Of my sparkling eyes

I’ll know when I have no need

To ponder his need of me

And more so

When I seek no answers

For my silent questions

I’ll know when making love

Is not enough for me

To feel truly close to him

Because I’ll know

There will so much more

To be close to

I’ll know when it happens

For I’ll never ask myself

How long he’ll stay in my life

Because one day I will look back

And it would have already happened

So no words can define

What love is to me

Because when it comes

I’ll know

Sx

(15^th January 1991)